I am starting to think I have split personality. BAD.
Lazy talk, since when I was...
I was...
Might update again. Might not. Babai...
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Zack and Cecil.
Wow I really suck when it comes to understanding girls. Shocking discovery. =="
I am starting to think I have split personality. BAD.
Lazy talk, since when I was...
I was...
Might update again. Might not. Babai...
I am starting to think I have split personality. BAD.
Lazy talk, since when I was...
I was...
Might update again. Might not. Babai...
Friday, July 18, 2008
Sei hensem.
hensemwannabe: You know what? I've made a shocking discovery...
Me: What?
hensemwannabe: As you know, lychee is a fruit.
Me: Yeah...
hensemwannabe: And fruits are born from OVARIES!
Me: Errr...
hensemwannabe: Since Fruits = Ovary and Fruit = {Lychee}, Lychee = Ovary! PLUS, Lychee = Li Qi, THUSSSS...
YOU'RE A GIRL!!!! NYAHAHAHAHHAHA.
Me: ...........
Me: What?
hensemwannabe: As you know, lychee is a fruit.
Me: Yeah...
hensemwannabe: And fruits are born from OVARIES!
Me: Errr...
hensemwannabe: Since Fruits = Ovary and Fruit = {Lychee}, Lychee = Ovary! PLUS, Lychee = Li Qi, THUSSSS...
YOU'RE A GIRL!!!! NYAHAHAHAHHAHA.
Me: ...........
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Redemption
Birthed from womb of Dragon's maw
And borne unto the stars
By light and darkness cast aloft
Are dreamtide oaths resworn
Moon is swathed in ever-light
Never again to know eclipse
Earth, with hallowed bounty reconciled
Yet fleeting is the reverie
When moon from shadow has egressed
Guided forth anew by light made manifest
Two bound by ties of blood
By Time and Fate then wrest apart
Unto lunar light and Gaian breast
Sins I have wrought
Blood I have spilled
This battle
For me and me alone
Against the darkness I have abandoned
Will this redemption elude me?
Years I have served
Fought blindly
Not knowing when and how to stop
Just blindly
Blindly obeying
Just a coward
Obeying when I ought not to
Strings of Fate
Friendship and rivalry
Bonds and relationships
Simple to weave but hard to severe
This heart of mine had me thinking
Was I doing the right thing?
Years of our past
Cherished moments and treasured times
Those that we shared trotting around
Carefree and gay
We were just children
Yet the day is upon us
Here we are once again
Face to face
Not as friends no more
But enemies who can't live with one another
O' Eden, why have such fate befell us?
Every swing of my blade
Every skip of my heartbeat
It pains me inside
It pains me!
Why must we, sworn brothers hurt each other?
Enveloped by impenetrable darkness
That was I
Who I was
But no longer!
Moving on with newfound Hope
Tightly-knitted bonds
A bloody past
What I am today
I am because of you
Stars, I reach for you!
Your pure and silent light
Glowing with grace in the peaceful night
Reminding me of how this place once was
A love-filled haven
Reminiscent of what we sworn to prevent
A war has broke out
Oh the irony!
The perpetrators were us!
The same two knights who swore
to protect this kingdom
As we embark on our Final Fantasy
One can only wonder
Whatever has happened to the
Theme of Love...
And borne unto the stars
By light and darkness cast aloft
Are dreamtide oaths resworn
Moon is swathed in ever-light
Never again to know eclipse
Earth, with hallowed bounty reconciled
Yet fleeting is the reverie
When moon from shadow has egressed
Guided forth anew by light made manifest
Two bound by ties of blood
By Time and Fate then wrest apart
Unto lunar light and Gaian breast
Sins I have wrought
Blood I have spilled
This battle
For me and me alone
Against the darkness I have abandoned
Will this redemption elude me?
Years I have served
Fought blindly
Not knowing when and how to stop
Just blindly
Blindly obeying
Just a coward
Obeying when I ought not to
Strings of Fate
Friendship and rivalry
Bonds and relationships
Simple to weave but hard to severe
This heart of mine had me thinking
Was I doing the right thing?
Years of our past
Cherished moments and treasured times
Those that we shared trotting around
Carefree and gay
We were just children
Yet the day is upon us
Here we are once again
Face to face
Not as friends no more
But enemies who can't live with one another
O' Eden, why have such fate befell us?
Every swing of my blade
Every skip of my heartbeat
It pains me inside
It pains me!
Why must we, sworn brothers hurt each other?
Enveloped by impenetrable darkness
That was I
Who I was
But no longer!
Moving on with newfound Hope
Tightly-knitted bonds
A bloody past
What I am today
I am because of you
Stars, I reach for you!
Your pure and silent light
Glowing with grace in the peaceful night
Reminding me of how this place once was
A love-filled haven
Reminiscent of what we sworn to prevent
A war has broke out
Oh the irony!
The perpetrators were us!
The same two knights who swore
to protect this kingdom
As we embark on our Final Fantasy
One can only wonder
Whatever has happened to the
Theme of Love...
-Edward the Bard
-----------
I wrote about 3/4 of it. =="
As some can tell, the first part has English so deep I had to keep my dictionary nearby. So it can't be me.
PLEASE FEEL FREE TO COMMENT AND FLAME AND INSULT WHATEVER.
As some can tell, the first part has English so deep I had to keep my dictionary nearby. So it can't be me.
PLEASE FEEL FREE TO COMMENT AND FLAME AND INSULT WHATEVER.
Friday, July 11, 2008
MAI TESITMONY!
Thought it was kinda funny. Or maybe I'm just being narcissistic.
“Eh, why the room no light one? We change room is it?”
I asked my fellow late-comers as we stood bizarrely outside our CG room.
“Duno, go see la.”
That’s how Hau Yon replied as we turned the doorknob.
……
It was a blurred moment as a flurry of projectiles flew towards us. I felt as though I have been warped back into ancient times where bow and arrows were held higher in esteem as I got shot hit after hit. Was this the end for me? Am I going to-
Wait a minute… What am I thinking??? THIS IS MADNESS!!!
“Madness? THIS IS BUD4CG!!!”
I awaken after being hit in the forehead by a pink Fruit Plus. I think it’s strawberry flavoured. Hmm…
I just only realized they shouted “SUPPLIES!” when I stepped into the room. This is weird… What has the room come to!?!?! Gone were the bright white lights of never ending brilliancy. Instead, we were greeted…. By disco lights!?!?!
THIS IS MADNESS!!!! (Refer to the previous lines…)
… *cough* Where was I?
Right, disco lights. And lots and lots of snacks. Candies, chips, drinks… And so we stepped into a new realm… We stepped into… Youth Alpha…
And thus, our adventurous journey in this diverse new world began. It was a rollercoaster ride from beginning to end and we were at the edge of our seats (okay maybe floor) for majority of the time. Thought provoking questions were raised. Answers of unfathomable sophiscated-ness and wisdom were invoked.
The unorthodox presentation made all of us comfortable, as if we’re at our own homes. This factor certainly aided the members to open themselves up to the rest and speak freely.
There were many moments throughout Alpha where certain members were on the verge of tears, through intense discussion and reflection of our past actions and current issues around the globe. The world as it stands, it seems, isn’t ideal at all, or so we think. So many things can be changed, yet so little are taking the initiative to do so. It pains some of us; we feel we want to make a change. Call us ambitious, but that’s how it is.
I personally feel that this program has brought about closely-knit friendship amongst us. With every passing session, our understanding of one another grew, and will continue to do so for years to come…
I’d think that our knowledge about Christianity on a whole has approached a new epoch following the proceedings of Youth Alpha. But of course, the best has yet to come. And the journey is still long… Amen.
“John” Yip Li Qi
P/S: I am still the most hensem member. Sorry.
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
TALK CRAP: QI VS JUNG
Session Start: 08 July 2008
- Qi. (jeffery_x@hotmail.com)
- anti-jung. (rage_avenger@hotmail.com)
| (20:28) anti-jung.: | hai |
|---|---|
| (20:38) | anti-jung. has changed his/her personal message to "it's payback time." |
| (20:40) | anti-jung. is now Offline |
| (21:52) Qi.: | PAYDAY! |
| (21:52) anti-jung.: | PERSIAN FAINTED |
| (21:52) anti-jung.: | MEOWTH IS BEYOND GODLIKE! |
| (21:52) anti-jung.: | HOLY SHIT! |
| (21:52) anti-jung.: | OWNAGE! |
| (21:52) Qi.: | ASH KETCHUP GAINS 500 GOLD! |
| (21:53) anti-jung.: | ASH PURCHASES A BOTTLE OF KETCHUP! |
| (21:53) anti-jung.: | ASH' RED TINT WENT UP BY 2%! |
| (21:53) Qi.: | ASH IS CRAZY REDLIKE! |
| (21:53) anti-jung.: | ASH IS 1 STEP CLOSER TO BECOMING THE KETCHUP MASTER! |
| (21:53) anti-jung.: | OWNAGE! |
| (21:53) anti-jung.: | ASH PUTS A BABOON's BUTT TO SHAME! |
| (21:53) anti-jung.: | ASH HAS CAUGHT A BABOON's BUTT! |
| (21:53) Qi.: | ASH GOES FOR CHILLI SAUCE! |
| (21:53) anti-jung.: | ASH NAMES IT MUM! |
| (21:54) anti-jung.: | Ash' wonderful plan backfires! |
| (21:54) anti-jung.: | Ash' red tint goes down by 16%! |
| (21:54) anti-jung.: | Ash' commits suicide in exasperation! |
| (21:54) Qi.: |  |
| (21:54) anti-jung.: | Setting the baboon's butt, a.k.a. Mum free in the process! |
| (21:55) Qi.: | wanna dota?  |
| (21:55) anti-jung.: | x boleh |
| (21:55) anti-jung.: | == |
| (21:56) anti-jung.: | i listen to song also kena diu |
| (21:56) anti-jung.: | <.< |
| (21:56) Qi.: | SLAP KAO U |
| (21:56) anti-jung.: | VAI? |
| (21:56) anti-jung.: | VAI LA VEI? |
| (21:56) Qi.: | CUZ U GAY |
| (21:56) anti-jung.: | NOOOOOEOEONEOENEOENOENENEEOE |
| (21:56) anti-jung.: | hi princess |
| (21:56) anti-jung.: | moonlit princess! |
| (21:56) anti-jung.: | |
| (21:56) Qi.: |  |
| (21:57) Qi.: | geng ler. |
| (21:57) anti-jung.: | geng!geng! |
| (21:57) anti-jung.: | GENGSTARZ! |
| (21:57) | Qi. has changed his/her personal message to "SOONAYI IS GHEY HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" |
| (21:57) Qi.: | YEAH I LIKE THAT |
| (21:57) Qi.: | GENGSTARZ |
| (21:58) Qi.: | A CROSS BETWEEN GENG, STARS, GANGSTER AND GAY STARZ! |
| (21:58) anti-jung.: | don't forget the honey stars! |
| (21:58) anti-jung.: | and gengars! |
| (21:58) anti-jung.: | and tar! |
| (21:58) anti-jung.: | and eng(lish)! |
| (21:58) anti-jung.: | and gen(2)! |
| (21:59) Qi.: | HANS2!!!!!QQ!!!! |
| (21:59) anti-jung.: | OMG HANS2? |
| (21:59) anti-jung.: | WHERE? |
| (21:59) anti-jung.: | HOW? |
| (21:59) anti-jung.: | WHEN? |
| (21:59) Qi.: | WHY! |
| (21:59) anti-jung.: | IS HE BACKDOORING?!?!? |
| (21:59) anti-jung.: | OMGOMGOMG |
| (21:59) Qi.: | no |
| (21:59) Qi.: | strange |
| (21:59) anti-jung.: | ME NO TP SCROLLZZZ |
| (21:59) Qi.: | but today he's just pushing normally.  |
| (21:59) Qi.: | MUST BE A PLAN!!! |
| (21:59) Qi.: | I DUN LIEK IT! |
| (21:59) anti-jung.: | YESSS |
| (21:59) anti-jung.: | ME TOO |
| (22:00) anti-jung.: | oh i showed huajie the 'so i herd u liek mudkipz' |
| (22:00) anti-jung.: | he laugh kaokao |
| (22:00) anti-jung.: | XD |
| (22:00) Qi.: | lol |
| (22:00) Qi.: | u ada read my blog? |
| (22:00) Qi.: | ada new joke |
| (22:00) anti-jung.: | read d |
| (22:00) anti-jung.: | sei joke spammer |
| (22:00) anti-jung.: | == |
| (22:00) Qi.: | =.= |
| (22:00) Qi.: | ppl so emo lately |
| (22:00) Qi.: | what to do |
| (22:00) anti-jung.: | see i so loyal |
| (22:00) anti-jung.: | everyone x update,i hari-hari check |
| (22:00) Qi.: | loyal then make your own blog pl0x |
| (22:01) anti-jung.: | cannot |
| (22:01) anti-jung.: | itu panggil loyal to self |
| (22:01) anti-jung.: | means selfish! |
| (22:01) anti-jung.: | x boleh x boleh |
| (22:01) Qi.: | NUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUu |
| (22:01) Qi.: | HENSEM X BOLEH MACAM TOOOO!!! |
| (22:01) Qi.: | TERLALU GEMUK GILAAA! |
| (22:01) anti-jung.: | HENSEM GEMUK? |
| (22:01) anti-jung.: | KOMBINASI YANG MENAKUTKAN! |
| (22:01) anti-jung.: | TETAPI BERKESAN! |
| (22:02) Qi.: | TERLALU TIDAK SEIMBANG!!! |
| (22:02) anti-jung.: | BETUL ITU |
| (22:02) anti-jung.: | ORANG INGGERIS PANGGIL ITU APE YA? |
| (22:02) anti-jung.: | APA APA...IMPA? |
| (22:02) anti-jung.: | ATAU INPA? |
| (22:02) Qi.: | MIMPA LA |
| (22:02) Qi.: | BODO |
| (22:02) anti-jung.: | OH OH |
| (22:02) anti-jung.: | MAAF SI HENSEM BERMISAI GERGASI |
| (22:02) anti-jung.: | KAMU TERLALU BIJAK |
| (22:02) anti-jung.: | SAYA BODo |
| (22:03) Qi.: | HYEK HYEK TAHU PUN! |
| (22:03) anti-jung.: | MIMPA |
| (22:03) anti-jung.: | BETUL MIMPA! |
| (22:03) Qi.: | SAYA SI DAVID SANG BIJAKSANA PAHLAWAN NAGA GERGASI YANG BERKOTEK RAKSASA |
| (22:03) Qi.: | JANGAN MAIN MAIN |
| (22:04) anti-jung.: | DAUD ATAU DAVID? |
| (22:04) anti-jung.: | TERDAPAT PELBAGAI KENIS RAKSASA |
| (22:04) Qi.: | DAUD DAVID |
| (22:04) Qi.: | SAMALAH |
| (22:04) Qi.: | PELBAGAI KENIS RAKSASA? |
| (22:04) anti-jung.: | YANG BESAR,KECIL,BERAMBUT BANYAK,BUSUK,DAN MERAH JAMBU |
| (22:04) Qi.: | KENIS!?!?!?! |
| (22:04) Qi.: | ATAU PENIS!?!?!? |
| (22:04) anti-jung.: | KOTEK ENGKAU JENIS RAKSASA APA? |
| (22:04) anti-jung.: | JENIS |
| (22:05) Qi.: | OH MAAF |
| (22:05) anti-jung.: | JENIS PENIS |
| (22:05) Qi.: | O_o |
| (22:05) anti-jung.: | o_O |
| (22:05) Qi.: | BESAR MATA DAN KECIL MATA |
| (22:05) Qi.: | DIPINGGIRKAN OLEH SATU "I" YANG TERJATUH |
| (22:06) anti-jung.: | WAAAAAh |
| (22:06) anti-jung.: | KOTEK KAMU SUNGGUH UNIK! |
| (22:06) anti-jung.: | TERRER! |
| (22:06) anti-jung.: | DAHSYAT! |
| (22:06) Qi.: | WATI KATA SAPU SAMPAH AMAT SYOK |
| (22:06) Qi.: | SAYA TERGODA NAK CUBA |
| (22:06) anti-jung.: | PERGILAH! |
| (22:06) anti-jung.: | SAYA PERNAH CUBA ATAS KEHENDAK WATI! |
| (22:06) anti-jung.: | BETUK BETUL SYOK! |
| (22:06) Qi.: | X MAU |
| (22:06) Qi.: | ITU WATI GEMUK BABI |
| (22:07) anti-jung.: | LEBIH SYOK DARIPADA MAKAN MENTOS PERISA DURIAN PADA PUKUL 1 MALAM SAMBIL BERMANDI PELUH DAN MENGUTIP BENIH PADI! |
| (22:07) anti-jung.: | KENAPA? |
| (22:07) anti-jung.: | WATI BUKAN BABI! |
| (22:07) anti-jung.: | DIA BABI BUTA! |
| (22:07) anti-jung.: | BB! |
| (22:07) anti-jung.: | BABI BUTA BERISI! |
| (22:07) anti-jung.: | BBB! |
| (22:07) anti-jung.: | BABI BUTA BERISI BIRU! |
| (22:07) anti-jung.: | BBBB |
| (22:08) anti-jung.: | BUNTUT BABI BUTA BERISI BIRU |
| (22:08) anti-jung.: | BBBBB |
| (22:08) anti-jung.: | @@ |
| (22:08) Qi.: | APA? |
| (22:08) Qi.: | SUDAH BERPUTUS ASA? |
| (22:08) Qi.: | SAYA MENERUSKAN! |
| (22:08) anti-jung.: | ....BETUL CAKAP KAMU! |
| (22:08) Qi.: | BUNTUT BABI BUTA BERISI BIRU BERPERISAI |
| (22:08) anti-jung.: | SAYA TIDAK PATUT! |
| (22:08) Qi.: | BBBBBB |
| (22:08) anti-jung.: | BERPERISAI?!!??! |
| (22:08) anti-jung.: | HEBAT! |
| (22:08) Qi.: | YA |
| (22:09) Qi.: | HYEK HYEK |
| (22:09) Qi.: | KEKUATAN SI DAUD |
| (22:09) anti-jung.: | BUNTUT BABI BUTA BERISI BIRU BERPERISAI BULU! |
| (22:09) Qi.: | X BOLEH DIBANDINGKAN |
| (22:09) anti-jung.: | BBBBBB |
| (22:09) anti-jung.: | BETUL ITU |
| (22:09) Qi.: | BUNTUT BABI BUTA BERISI BIRU BERPERISAI BULU BURUNG! |
| (22:09) Qi.: | BBBBBBBB |
| (22:09) anti-jung.: | TETAPI KALAU NAK BERADU KEPANJANGAN KOTEK |
| (22:09) anti-jung.: | DAVID AKAN KALAH DENGAN TERUK |
| (22:09) anti-jung.: | HILANG SEMUA MARUAH! |
| (22:10) Qi.: | YA ITU BODOH |
| (22:10) anti-jung.: | BUNTUT BABI BUTA BERISI BIRU BERPERISAI BULU BURUNG BODOH |
| (22:10) anti-jung.: | BBBBBBBB |
| (22:10) Qi.: | TERLALU TIDAK SEIMBANG! |
| (22:11) Qi.: | MIMPA! |
| (22:11) Qi.: | BUNTUT BESAR BABI BUTA BERISI BIRU BERPERISAI BULU BURUNG BODOH |
| (22:11) Qi.: | BBBBBBBBBB |
| (22:11) anti-jung.: | MIMPA BETUL |
| (22:11) anti-jung.: | MIMPA BETUL |
| (22:11) anti-jung.: | KENAPA PERKATAAN MIMPA DIBERI NAMA ITY? |
| (22:11) anti-jung.: | ITU** |
| (22:12) anti-jung.: | BUNTUT BESAR BERINTI BABI BUTA BERISI BIRU BERPERISAI BULU BURUNG BODOH! |
| (22:12) anti-jung.: | BBBBBBBBBB |
| (22:12) Qi.: | MY INDIAN MISTRESS PLAYED ALIBABA |
| (22:12) Qi.: | MIMPA! |
| (22:12) anti-jung.: | REALLY? |
| (22:12) anti-jung.: | I THOUGHT ITS MONKEY ISOTOPES MARRIED PUBLIC ANNOUNCER |
| (22:13) Qi.: | WRONG |
| (22:13) Qi.: | MONKEY NO ISOTOPES |
| (22:13) Qi.: | THEY GENERIC |
| (22:13) anti-jung.: | OR MASCULINE IDEOGRAM MANHANDLED PHILIPINO AUNTY |
| (22:13) anti-jung.: | OHHH |
| (22:13) anti-jung.: | NO WONDER |
| (22:13) anti-jung.: | YOU SO BIJAK |
| (22:14) anti-jung.: | YOU ALSO MIMPA! |
| (22:14) Qi.: | HYEK HYEK |
| (22:14) anti-jung.: | I WONDER WHAT DOES HYEK HYEK STAND FOR |
| (22:15) anti-jung.: | HAMSAP YADO ATE KOKWENG,HE YAPPED ENGLISH KOALABEAR!??!?! |
| (22:15) anti-jung.: | YODA** |
| (22:16) Qi.: | BUT THAT'S HYAK HYEK! |
| (22:16) anti-jung.: | OH |
| (22:16) anti-jung.: | REARRANGE IT LOR |
| (22:16) anti-jung.: | ATE>EAT |
| (22:16) anti-jung.: | GENG! |
| (22:17) anti-jung.: | LET's PLAY THIS GAME I PLAYED WITH JOEL TODAY |
| (22:17) Qi.: | TIDAK SEIMBANG!!!! |
| (22:17) Qi.: | WOT GAME |
| (22:17) anti-jung.: | CHOOSE A PERSOn |
| (22:17) anti-jung.: | REAL LIFE PERSON |
| (22:17) anti-jung.: | WE DESIGN AN AVATAR FOR A RANDOM CHOSEN PERSON GAME |
| (22:17) Qi.: | YUNWEI |
| (22:18) anti-jung.: | OKAY |
| (22:18) anti-jung.: | FIRST,CHOOSE A HEAD SHAPE |
| (22:18) Qi.: | ROUND |
Meanwhile.....
Session Start: 08 July 2008
- Qi. (jeffery_x@hotmail.com)
- *naf soonyi. (shunyi92@hotmail.com)
| (21:55) Qi.: | =.= |
|---|---|
(21:56)  soonyi.: | what |
| (21:56) Qi.: | =.= |
| (21:56) soonyi.: | hi to you too lah |
| (21:56) soonyi.: | lol |
| (21:56) Qi.: | =.= |
| (21:56) soonyi.: | eh staying back for painting tomorrow |
| (21:56) soonyi.: | right |
| (21:56) Qi.: | i'll pass. have school team prac for basketball |
| (21:57) soonyi.: | nooo =( |
| (21:57) soonyi.: | yer |
| (21:57) soonyi.: | spoil sport =( |
| (21:57) Qi.: | =.= |
| (21:57) | Qi. has changed his/her personal message to "SOONAYI IS GHEY HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" |
| (21:57) soonyi.: | enough alreadyy |
| (21:58) soonyi.: | what time's bball |
| (21:58) soonyi.: | wtf is with your pm? |
| (21:58) Qi.: | 2-5 |
| (21:58) soonyi.: | i barely talked to you all day lah |
| (21:58) Qi.: | my pm speaks only truth. |
| (21:58) Qi.: | it must've been kenny then. |
| (21:59) soonyi.: | what was kenny? |
| (21:59) Qi.: | the gayasss |
| (22:00) soonyi.: | i don't get you. |
| (22:00) soonyi.: | lol |
| (22:01) Qi.: | nvm |
| (22:01) Qi.: | anyway |
| (22:01) Qi.: | i was talking about SOONAYI |
| (22:01) Qi.: | not soonyi |
| (22:01) Qi.: | you're safe. |
| (22:10) soonyi.: | whateverrr |
| (22:10) soonyi.: | lol |
| (22:10) soonyi.: | gaylord |
| (22:11) soonyi.: | should i paint class |
| (22:11) Qi.: | PAINT LA |
| (22:15) soonyi.: | o |
| (22:15) soonyi.: | kay |
| (22:15) soonyi.: | gosh. |
| (22:15) soonyi.: | sorry lah. |
| (22:18) Qi.: | HAHAHAHAHA |
| (22:18) Qi.: | SORRY |
| (22:18) Qi.: | I PLAYING CAPS LOCK GAME WITH JUNG KIANG |
| (22:18) soonyi.: | che |
| (22:18) soonyi.: | h |
| (22:18) soonyi.: | wtf |
| (22:18) soonyi.: | hahahaahahahaahaa |
| (22:18) soonyi.: | damn scary wei |
| (22:18) Qi.: | WHY |
| (22:19) soonyi.: | wouldn't you think i sound angry if i just said |
| (22:19) soonyi.: | PAINT LA |
| (22:19) Qi.: | NO |
| (22:19) Qi.: | CUZ THE PERSON YOU WERE TALKING TO |
| (22:19) Qi.: | IS LIQI |
| (22:19) Qi.: | HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA |
| (22:20) soonyi.: | WHO IS ACTUALLY DAMN TEMPERMENTAL |
| (22:21) Qi.: | RLY/ |
| (22:21) Qi.: | RLY? |
| (22:22) soonyi.: | QUITE LAH. |
| (22:22) soonyi.: | HAHAAHHA. |
| (22:24) Qi.: | HAHAAHAHHAHA |
Monday, July 7, 2008
Happy People.
Sempena all the emos lately, I hope I can bring laughter to you all through my collection of jokes, if only for a few seconds. :)
Hahahaha, but of course, that's if you people still read this isolated piece of junk that has hardly seen any articles penned down for nearly a month or so.
I might plot a comeback, but don't bet on it.
DISCLAIMER: SOME OF THESE ARE RATHER SICK. AT YOUR OWN RISK PLEASE.
-------
Aging Explorer
A young reporter went to a retirement home to interview an aged but legendary explorer. The reporter asked the old man to tell him the most frightening experience he had ever had.
The old explorer said, "Once I was hunting Bengal tigers in the jungles of India. I was on a narrow path and my faithful native gunbearer was behind me. Suddenly the largest tiger I have ever seen leaped onto the path in front of us. I turned to get my weapon only to find the native had fled. The tiger leapt toward me with a mighty ROARRRR! I shit in my pants.
The reporter said, "Under those circumstances anyone would have done the same."
The old explorer said, "No, not then - just now when I went ROARRRR!"
-------
Soldier on the Run
A soldier was running down the road, and came to a fork in the road, where he saw a nun standing there. Out of breath he asked, "Please Sister, may I hide under your skirt for a few minutes? I'll explain WHY later."
The nun agreed. Just a moment later, two Military Police came running along and asked, "Sister, have you seen a soldier running by here??"
The nun replied, "He went that way." After the MP's disappeared, the soldier crawled out from under her skirt and said, "I can't thank you enough Sister. You see, I don't want to go to Iraq."
The nun said, "I think I can fully understand your fear."
The soldier added, "I hope you don't think I'm rude or impertinent, but you have a great pair of legs!" The nun replied, "If you had looked a little higher, you would have seen a great pair of balls. I don't want to go to Iraq either!"
-------
3 Roosters
1 normal, 1 retarded and 1 gay.
Normal : cock-a-doodle-dooo !!!
Retarded : doodle-cock-a-dooo !!!
Gay : any-cock-will dooo !!!
-------
Seminarians
Ten seminarians are about to be ordained as priests. As a last test; the seminarians would be lined up buck naked and with a small bell tied to their penis. A naked lady would then parade in front of each seminarian. If the bell rings then they are having impure thoughts and would be denied priesthood. The woman pranced around in front of each seminarian but no bell rung.
The superiors were satisfied with this and were very happy. Suddenly; one of the bells came loose and clattered on the floor. The embarassed seminarian bent down to pick it up and suddenly all nine bells rang....
-------
Eccentric Professor
An eccentric philosophy professor gave a one question final exam after a semester dealing with a broad array of topics.
The class was already seated and ready to go when the professor picked up his chair, plopped it on his desk and wrote on the board: "Using everything we have learned this semester, prove that this chair does not exist."
Fingers flew, erasers erased, notebooks were filled in furious fashion. Some students wrote over 30 pages in one hour attempting to refute the existence of the chair. One member of the class however, was up and finished in less than a minute.
Weeks later when the grades were posted, the rest of the group wondered how he could have gotten an A when he had barely written anything at all.
His answer consisted of two words: "What chair?"
----------
Screw Or Swim
Dave walks into a bar and sees John sitting at the end of the counter with a great big smile on his face.
Dave says "John what are you so happy for?"
"Well Dave, I gotta tell ya... Yesterday I was out waxing my boat, just waxing my boat, and a redhead came up to me... tits out to here, Dave, tits out to here!
She says "Can I have a ride in your boat?" I said 'Sure you can have a ride in my boat.' So I took her way out, Dave. I turned off the key and I said 'Its either screw or swim!' She couldn't swim, Dave, she couldn't swim!!."
The next day Dave walks into a bar and sees John sitting at the end of the counter with a bigger smile on his face.
Dave says "What are you so happy about today John?"
"Well Dave... I gotta tell ya... Yesterday I was out waxing my boat, just waxing my boat and a BEAUTIFUL blonde came up to me... tits out to here, Dave, tits out to here! She said 'Can I have a ride in your boat?' "Sure you can have a ride in my boat." So I took her way out, Dave, way out much further than the last one. I turned off the key and I said 'Its either screw or swim!' She couldn't swim!!, Dave, she couldn't swim!!!!."
A couple days pass and Dave walks into a bar and sees John down there crying over a beer.
Dave says "John, what are you so sad for?"
"Well Dave, I gotta tell ya.... Yesterday I was out waxing my boat, just waxing my boat, and the most desirable brunette came up to me... tits WAY out to here, Dave, tits WAY out to here. I had more wood than my boat does. She says "Can I have a ride in your boat?" "Sure you can have a ride in my boat." So I took her way out, Dave, way WAY out... much further than the last two. I turned off the key, and looked at her tits and said 'Its either screw or swim!!'. Then, she pulled down her pants.... she had a dick, Dave !!! She had a great BIG dick!!! .....
and.... Dave, ..... I CAN'T SWIM!!!"
------------
Chinese Laundry
A woman was unhappy with the way her laundry was done at the local Chinese Laundry, so she wrote a note and put it in the bag with the next collection of soiled clothes :
"USE MORE SOAP ON PANTIES!"
She got the clean laundry back, and was still dissatisfied with the results, so the following week she enclosed another note:
"USE MORE SOAP ON PANTIES!"
The Chinese laundryman became very annoyed, and when her clean laundry was delivered, it contained a note from him:
"I USE PLENTY SOAP ON PANTIES!!! USE MORE PAPER ON ASS!!"
-------
Swollen
Don't laugh!" said the patient
"Of course I won't laugh," the doctor said. "I'm a professional. In over twenty years I've never laughed at a patient."
"Okay then," Ed said, and proceeded to drop his trousers, revealing the tiniest penis the doctor had ever seen. It couldn't have been bigger than the size of a AAA battery.
Unable to control himself, the doctor started giggling, then fell laughing to the floor. Ten minutes later he was able to struggle to his feet and regain his composure.
"I'm so sorry," said the doctor. "I really am. I don't know what came over me. On my honor as a doctor and a gentleman, I promise it won't happen again.
Now...what seems to be the problem?"
"It's swollen," the patient replied.
---------
Ugly Bus
A bus carrying only ugly people crashes into an oncoming truck, and everyone inside dies. They then get to meet their maker, and because of the grief they have experienced; He decides to grant them one wish each, before they enter Paradise.
They're all lined up, and God asks the first one what the wish is. "I want to be gorgeous," and so God snaps His fingers, and it is done.
The second one in line hears this and says "I want to be gorgeous too."
Another snap of His fingers and the wish is granted.
This goes on for a while but when God is halfway down the line, the last guy in line starts laughing. When there are only ten people left, this guy is rolling on the floor, laughing.
Finally, God reaches this guy and asks him what his wish will be.
The guy calms down and says: " Make 'em all ugly again."
------------
What did he name them?
An unmarried woman is newly pregnant and gets into an auto accident. She suffers a head injury and lapses into a coma for nine months. When she awakens in the hospital, she panics and asks about her baby.
Her doctor is called in and gives her a mild sedative, then he sits down to answer her questions. "I'm so happy to see you recovering", he says. The woman responds, "Thank you doctor, but what about my baby? Is everything all right?" He replies, "Yes, despite your injury, we were able to perform a fairly normal delivery procedure."
"In fact," he goes on, "you've given birth to twins - a boy and a girl". The woman is very happy and asks when she can see her new babies. The doctor replies, "Right away, but we've already sent the infants home with your brother. We'll call and tell him you're okay. While you were unconscious, your brother took care of everything for you. He even gave the babies names."
At this point, the woman gets upset, "Doctor, my brother is an idiot! What name did he give my little girl?" The doctor answered that her name was Denise. "Oh, Denise, that's not so bad. What name did he give my boy?" The doctor answered, "Denephew".
------------
Some of these are rather old. But worthy of a chuckle nevertheless. :D
Liesa: Whatever you're facing, remember that me, waiwai, jou and the rest will always be by your side. We'll be there for you. :)
Junyen: Rise and shine, pretty. Don't feel so upset, you're not in the wrong and we'll stand up for you and together we'll face whatever may come. :D
Pou: Not sure what happened, but cheer up! :)
Clara: I don't really know you well, but your blog has been really melancholic. Perhaps you should smile a little more? What's a cheerleader that's not cheerful? :)
Bai bai blog.
Hahahaha, but of course, that's if you people still read this isolated piece of junk that has hardly seen any articles penned down for nearly a month or so.
I might plot a comeback, but don't bet on it.
DISCLAIMER: SOME OF THESE ARE RATHER SICK. AT YOUR OWN RISK PLEASE.
-------
Aging Explorer
A young reporter went to a retirement home to interview an aged but legendary explorer. The reporter asked the old man to tell him the most frightening experience he had ever had.
The old explorer said, "Once I was hunting Bengal tigers in the jungles of India. I was on a narrow path and my faithful native gunbearer was behind me. Suddenly the largest tiger I have ever seen leaped onto the path in front of us. I turned to get my weapon only to find the native had fled. The tiger leapt toward me with a mighty ROARRRR! I shit in my pants.
The reporter said, "Under those circumstances anyone would have done the same."
The old explorer said, "No, not then - just now when I went ROARRRR!"
-------
Soldier on the Run
A soldier was running down the road, and came to a fork in the road, where he saw a nun standing there. Out of breath he asked, "Please Sister, may I hide under your skirt for a few minutes? I'll explain WHY later."
The nun agreed. Just a moment later, two Military Police came running along and asked, "Sister, have you seen a soldier running by here??"
The nun replied, "He went that way." After the MP's disappeared, the soldier crawled out from under her skirt and said, "I can't thank you enough Sister. You see, I don't want to go to Iraq."
The nun said, "I think I can fully understand your fear."
The soldier added, "I hope you don't think I'm rude or impertinent, but you have a great pair of legs!" The nun replied, "If you had looked a little higher, you would have seen a great pair of balls. I don't want to go to Iraq either!"
-------
3 Roosters
1 normal, 1 retarded and 1 gay.
Normal : cock-a-doodle-dooo !!!
Retarded : doodle-cock-a-dooo !!!
Gay : any-cock-will dooo !!!
-------
Seminarians
Ten seminarians are about to be ordained as priests. As a last test; the seminarians would be lined up buck naked and with a small bell tied to their penis. A naked lady would then parade in front of each seminarian. If the bell rings then they are having impure thoughts and would be denied priesthood. The woman pranced around in front of each seminarian but no bell rung.
The superiors were satisfied with this and were very happy. Suddenly; one of the bells came loose and clattered on the floor. The embarassed seminarian bent down to pick it up and suddenly all nine bells rang....
-------
Eccentric Professor
An eccentric philosophy professor gave a one question final exam after a semester dealing with a broad array of topics.
The class was already seated and ready to go when the professor picked up his chair, plopped it on his desk and wrote on the board: "Using everything we have learned this semester, prove that this chair does not exist."
Fingers flew, erasers erased, notebooks were filled in furious fashion. Some students wrote over 30 pages in one hour attempting to refute the existence of the chair. One member of the class however, was up and finished in less than a minute.
Weeks later when the grades were posted, the rest of the group wondered how he could have gotten an A when he had barely written anything at all.
His answer consisted of two words: "What chair?"
----------
Screw Or Swim
Dave walks into a bar and sees John sitting at the end of the counter with a great big smile on his face.
Dave says "John what are you so happy for?"
"Well Dave, I gotta tell ya... Yesterday I was out waxing my boat, just waxing my boat, and a redhead came up to me... tits out to here, Dave, tits out to here!
She says "Can I have a ride in your boat?" I said 'Sure you can have a ride in my boat.' So I took her way out, Dave. I turned off the key and I said 'Its either screw or swim!' She couldn't swim, Dave, she couldn't swim!!."
The next day Dave walks into a bar and sees John sitting at the end of the counter with a bigger smile on his face.
Dave says "What are you so happy about today John?"
"Well Dave... I gotta tell ya... Yesterday I was out waxing my boat, just waxing my boat and a BEAUTIFUL blonde came up to me... tits out to here, Dave, tits out to here! She said 'Can I have a ride in your boat?' "Sure you can have a ride in my boat." So I took her way out, Dave, way out much further than the last one. I turned off the key and I said 'Its either screw or swim!' She couldn't swim!!, Dave, she couldn't swim!!!!."
A couple days pass and Dave walks into a bar and sees John down there crying over a beer.
Dave says "John, what are you so sad for?"
"Well Dave, I gotta tell ya.... Yesterday I was out waxing my boat, just waxing my boat, and the most desirable brunette came up to me... tits WAY out to here, Dave, tits WAY out to here. I had more wood than my boat does. She says "Can I have a ride in your boat?" "Sure you can have a ride in my boat." So I took her way out, Dave, way WAY out... much further than the last two. I turned off the key, and looked at her tits and said 'Its either screw or swim!!'. Then, she pulled down her pants.... she had a dick, Dave !!! She had a great BIG dick!!! .....
and.... Dave, ..... I CAN'T SWIM!!!"
------------
Chinese Laundry
A woman was unhappy with the way her laundry was done at the local Chinese Laundry, so she wrote a note and put it in the bag with the next collection of soiled clothes :
"USE MORE SOAP ON PANTIES!"
She got the clean laundry back, and was still dissatisfied with the results, so the following week she enclosed another note:
"USE MORE SOAP ON PANTIES!"
The Chinese laundryman became very annoyed, and when her clean laundry was delivered, it contained a note from him:
"I USE PLENTY SOAP ON PANTIES!!! USE MORE PAPER ON ASS!!"
-------
Swollen
Don't laugh!" said the patient
"Of course I won't laugh," the doctor said. "I'm a professional. In over twenty years I've never laughed at a patient."
"Okay then," Ed said, and proceeded to drop his trousers, revealing the tiniest penis the doctor had ever seen. It couldn't have been bigger than the size of a AAA battery.
Unable to control himself, the doctor started giggling, then fell laughing to the floor. Ten minutes later he was able to struggle to his feet and regain his composure.
"I'm so sorry," said the doctor. "I really am. I don't know what came over me. On my honor as a doctor and a gentleman, I promise it won't happen again.
Now...what seems to be the problem?"
"It's swollen," the patient replied.
---------
Ugly Bus
A bus carrying only ugly people crashes into an oncoming truck, and everyone inside dies. They then get to meet their maker, and because of the grief they have experienced; He decides to grant them one wish each, before they enter Paradise.
They're all lined up, and God asks the first one what the wish is. "I want to be gorgeous," and so God snaps His fingers, and it is done.
The second one in line hears this and says "I want to be gorgeous too."
Another snap of His fingers and the wish is granted.
This goes on for a while but when God is halfway down the line, the last guy in line starts laughing. When there are only ten people left, this guy is rolling on the floor, laughing.
Finally, God reaches this guy and asks him what his wish will be.
The guy calms down and says: " Make 'em all ugly again."
------------
What did he name them?
An unmarried woman is newly pregnant and gets into an auto accident. She suffers a head injury and lapses into a coma for nine months. When she awakens in the hospital, she panics and asks about her baby.
Her doctor is called in and gives her a mild sedative, then he sits down to answer her questions. "I'm so happy to see you recovering", he says. The woman responds, "Thank you doctor, but what about my baby? Is everything all right?" He replies, "Yes, despite your injury, we were able to perform a fairly normal delivery procedure."
"In fact," he goes on, "you've given birth to twins - a boy and a girl". The woman is very happy and asks when she can see her new babies. The doctor replies, "Right away, but we've already sent the infants home with your brother. We'll call and tell him you're okay. While you were unconscious, your brother took care of everything for you. He even gave the babies names."
At this point, the woman gets upset, "Doctor, my brother is an idiot! What name did he give my little girl?" The doctor answered that her name was Denise. "Oh, Denise, that's not so bad. What name did he give my boy?" The doctor answered, "Denephew".
------------
Some of these are rather old. But worthy of a chuckle nevertheless. :D
Liesa: Whatever you're facing, remember that me, waiwai, jou and the rest will always be by your side. We'll be there for you. :)
Junyen: Rise and shine, pretty. Don't feel so upset, you're not in the wrong and we'll stand up for you and together we'll face whatever may come. :D
Pou: Not sure what happened, but cheer up! :)
Clara: I don't really know you well, but your blog has been really melancholic. Perhaps you should smile a little more? What's a cheerleader that's not cheerful? :)
Bai bai blog.
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