Sunday, October 12, 2008

Love. Vows. Family. Affairs. Treachery. Lies. Bonds.

This is one extremely long post. Looking at the picture, you might think, 'meh it's just a boring review of a show.'

I think. It's worth every single nanosecond spent.














Moonlight Resonance.

Words can't describe what I feel about this show.

Never have I ever been impacted this much by a single series.

Until now, the "atmosphere" (lack of a better word) still lingers in my heart.

I have always boasted about being a guy who hardly ever cries. But, watching this show, I cried at least twice in the last three days.

Each day I watched til morning. Even forgoing playing games.

Several times, I was angered. I punched tables.

Several times, I cried. Touched.

Many times, I felt like I wanted to just rush to my mother's arms and hug her, and tell her how much I love her.

Many times, I despaired. Why isn't my family as tightly knitted?

I was envious.

Siblings The entire family playing around together, caring for each other, running around searching for each other, helping one another, comforting one another... The list goes on...

I admit, I've never felt my family bonds were very strong. Deep in my heart, I've always been longing for sisters/brothers closer to my age, or even younger ones, perhaps I was even searching for that in friends. But I pondered while studying, was that really the matter?

I pondered, and pondered. I knew I could not study that evening. Not a chance. I was too distracted. I took out my phone. I sent a message to my mum.

妈,我爱你!

I sat there, staring at my book as my mind flew elsewhere, while my friends around me were studying in that awkward silence.

Honestly, it flew across my mind at times...

This silence... It was too scary... I thought for a moment I was sitting around strangers.

Images from the show flickered in my thoughts.

How... Stark......

Our lives... Isn't it... Ordinary? I understand, it's a TV show. But... Is reality really so much a big difference? I'm unwilling to believe that.

My childhood.... I hardly have any recollection about my siblings about them back then... When I was small, I was too small to understand. And when I was older, they were already far ahead. Very far ahead. I was left in the shadows again... The three of them studied in the same school, I wonder how it felt?

As I ventured further down Ponderland, I asked myself more questions, questions that I wasn't sure how to answer myself.

Why?

...

How?

...

When?

...

Can I?



---

Prior to writing this paragraph, my mum walked down the stairs and sat on the couch.

I looked her way, gazing at her back.

Something told me I should go to her side and hug her.

I did just that. And kissed her on the forehead.

I said "I love you."

And it struck me.

This must have been the first time I have ever said those 3 words verbally for the past 3 or so years.

However hard I recall, I can't remember a time where I said that to her face during my secondary school years.

I cried once again, in my mother's arms.

When I walked down the stairs after bathing. I saw my mum looking at her phone. She was trying to reply my message in chinese but did not know how to operate it.

I told her she could just tell me, but she insisted on sending a message. With a little help from me. She managed to.

妈妈也爱你,宝贝!

You might think I'm a little retarded, helping my mum send a message to myself? Hahaha.

She then urged me to send a message to my dad as well. Hahaha honestly, I was closer to my mum than my dad. If I haven't told my mum that I love her for 3 years now, how long has it been for my dad?

'i love you too son'

Tears welled up again as my mum stood beside me. She read this very post in it's pre-published form and told me how she was reminded about herself and her father.

She continued telling me how she wasn't particularly close with grandpa and how she regrets not being able to accompany him in his final hours... And only managed to plant a kiss on his forehead overdue.

Speaking on, she started sobbing herself.

Soon, my sister saw us. She too read my unborn blog post.

Talking and talking. We ended up laying on our mum's chest sobbing.

Let's make up for lost time. It's not too late yet.

---

Family,

-Parents and their children, considered as a group, whether dwelling together or not.

This show made me break my blogging hiatus.

That alone speaks how highly I rate this.

It surely has changed my life for the better, I hope it does for you too.


Remember.

Treasure what's before you.
Love your family and friends.
Trust them.
Care for them.
Help them.
Let them help you.
Love them.

Never lie.
Never steal.
Never betray.
Never fabricate.
Never destroy.
Never take what's not yours.
NEVER play with feelings.
NEVER fiddle with emotions and trust.
NEVER hurt your loved ones.


Above all else...

Before it's to late.

Let them know,

You love them.

For time consumes all.


My family and friends,

Sorry for my wrongdoings.
Thank you for being there for me.
I love you all.


If you've spent time reading these emotions poured out from my heart.

Why not hug your family and tell them 'I love you' today?

I did it. Your turn?

2 comments:

KarMunn said...

this. must. be. a. very. good. show.

sooo watching it after exams.
i know i will get addicted.

Mel said...

Omigosh. This post nearly made me cry. ><

And that's really saying something.